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Wednesday, February 18, 2015

The Green Eyed Monster is my Friend

The green eyes monster.  Displeased.  Vexed.  These are just some of the negative connotations we have when we think about jealousy.  It’s bad for your self-esteem, for your health and your mind.  It’s bad for your relationships and it does no good to be jealous of what others have.  However, I have found that jealousy can be a good thing. 

When you find yourself feeling jealous of another person, of their character, it is because you see something that they have or some quality that they possess that seems to be lacking from your own life.  Yes, I admit that if you stew in your jealousy and harbor negative thoughts towards this person than yes, jealousy will be bad for you.  But if you recognized your jealousy as a sign that there may be a part of your life or yourself that needs work, you could come to see the transforming qualities jealousy can have. 

Let me be clear, the point is not to see something someone has or something they are and go become that.  The point is that when you feel that longing for something you don’t have, you should really examine the reasons behind why you don’t have it.  If it’s because life has handed someone a different path that may seem more glitzy or easier (and let me assure you no one’s life is as easy or glamorous as it looks from the outside) than take a deep breath and let that longing go.  If you were meant to be born into that body or that family or have that life, you would have it.  It is useless to wish for what life has given someone else because in the process you will often miss the wonderful things that life has given you.  However, if you don’t have something that someone else has because you did not work as hard as they did to get it than there is nothing standing in the way of attaining the things you want except for you.

I have found that my own jealousy, when properly analyzed and fully understood, has proved to make me a more productive, driven, and passionate person.  It has helped me to re-focus my goals and has given me a renewed energy and drive to pursue the path that I long to take.  Now when I see my friends running marathons I no longer pout that they were blessed with the athletic capability to do something truly awesome, instead I acknowledge the massive amounts of training and work that went into reaching that goal and I get my ass to the gym.  I may never achieve marathon running status myself, but at least, by striving to better myself, I am keeping that door open.  When I see my friends participating in amazing internships and taking their education and passions into their own hands, I no longer curse the world that gave me less motivation and a hazier path than theirs.  Instead I celebrate their accomplishments and have faith that if I always work a little bit harder than I want to, then one day I will end up a little bit happier, a little bit more accomplished, and perhaps in the future, I will have less to be jealous of and more to be proud of.

1 comment:

  1. Wow Riley! I love this post and how you took such a negative feeling, gave it a new perspective and turned it into a positive, driving factor. Will definitely try to keep this in mind the next time the "green eyed monster" comes to visit. Happy to see you writing a blog and can't wait to read more!


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